I met a lady over 50.
As the wheel of our conversation rolled we came to know about each other and interests gradually grew both ways.
I found she was single, separated and living with her daughter’s family for last three years.
Her grandson is young and a good attention grabber. She enjoys talking and playing with him.
But her mind is busy with her memories.
Her words find ways to spill out of her heart and she has written many dozens of poetry as if she is still hiding him under her poetry.
In fact, poetry glued us to talk but the sea of her sadness continues to flow.
She had drenched herself into memories.
I asked: Why have you walled yourself? Get out of this. It is over.
I have no walls. I have personal space and boundaries. She replied.
I really appreciate the mind which keeps the bygone life alive and burn the midnight oil while shaping their pains into a work of art.
However, I strongly believe they don’t have the relationship that opens the right door.
No one wants to live alone, in memories of unhappy incidences.
It is not a choice but a situation where you are arrested by your ghost.
You are no more in control of your own emotions so channelizing that energy into words is the best option. But how will licking your own wound serve and help you to get out of this?
She said she tries, she talks with many people, both men and women. Give everyone a space to talk but when she feels man is pushy and in hurry she withdraws. She doesn’t want to get into a cat and dog relationship.
Fear is probably the most difficult thing to conquer when you are struggling with night mares.
I like to treat everyone as I treat myself. She said.
Most men just want to get understood. They don’t care to understand who is who.
In this big world of unknown faces woman wants someone who can come out of her dream. This romantic idea does not always work.
People mostly come with preconceived notions and start seeing others inside out.
It isn’t fair to judge but that is what preconceived notions are.
I have learnt to take life one day at a time. One person at a time. If you mix two persons in your mind, then you can’t conclude correctly anyone for sure.
I learnt: Our circumstances can’t be ideal, may not be right all the time but if you don’t love and support yourself then you can’t do it for others.
People often meet but fail to care as the hardest people to understand are the other people.
People get attracted to wrong types of person – a poor man walking in rich shoes.
They get a preconceived thought and they generally walk away soon when they do not get what they want. It happens a lot.
Man and woman relationship is beautiful but woman is unsure. Your touch, a man’s touch scares her.
If a woman comes to you, it is possible that she wants to be your friend and get to know you.
Tell her the truth. Let her judge you. If she likes you she will surely make you feel a king.