10 Reasons People Withdraw in Relationships


I love to talk and recently I was talking with a lady who suddenly stopped talking and withdraws herself and that draw my interest in knowing the reasons as why people suddenly withdraws? Is it normal?

While talking with her I had noted that she needs a coaching and counseling. Her frustration was piling. Her relationship with her husband and other family members were not good so I was trying to listen her patiently however she withdrew and stop talking with me.

I feel curious to know as why someone suddenly withdraws and I find a few interesting facts of withdrawal in relationships, as:

  • Can have fear in getting close: When you are talking with someone about his or her life in particularly gradually many incidences of life comes into open and a new person feels insecure and somehow stop talking. It is possible that they might come back again and like to talk but it is natural that they can withdraw to feel safe.
  • Can have a fear of rejection: It is a very common feeling that prevails when you are in a process of coming in contact with a new person. Your old rejection often comes in mind that stops you from further repetition. (Indeed, this woman had told me that one of her very close school friend suddenly withdraw from her for no reason after her marriage that made her shocked and after that she fears in cultivating any closeness and never like to open herself with anyone.)
  • Can have too much pressure due to this new contact: One thing which is tepid can be scalding for other and it often happens in relationship too. When you speak something which you feel it is something you should not then it starts giving you guilt and your withdrawal starts. You are moved back in your past mentally where your problem lies and you are then struggling hard to get back to your normal emotions.
  • Can have anger: Well, it is better to withdraw than to say something ill to someone and later feel bad.  Anger is called as a temporary madness so it is good to be silent and allow time to pass easily and then start again after sometime if possible.
  • Can have pressure from home or outside: Yes, friendship between a man and a woman is not easy and simple (at least in our society). It is possible that outside pressures can stop and one or both and they choose to withdraw.
  • Can have miscommunication: it happens one feels that other is not able understand clearly and gradually relationship get over.
  • Can have dissatisfaction: We often come into relationship with different purpose and when we find that it is not working, we withdraw.
  • Can have different ideologies: No two people are same and sometime people fail to give space the ideology of others and that gradually becomes the reason of split.
  • Can have mismatch expectation of love: The feeling of love and intimacy is something that grows automatically inside a relationship and when people feel that it is not there anymore relationship end.
  • Can have impatience: people don’t have time to understand others. They want other to understand him or her and that makes situation difficult and relation ends.

Well, possibilities can be many which can stop the flow of a good relationship however it is always good to start slow and take time before opening your heart.

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